'Lady In The Water'
(Paul Giamatti, Bryce Dallas Howard, Mary Beth Hurt, Freddy Rodriguez, Jeffrey Wright, Sarita Choudhury, Bob Balaban, et al / PG-13 / 87 mins / BVHE)
Overview: An apartment superintendent (Paul Giamatti) discovers an unusual woman (Bryce Dallas Howard) swimming in the complex's pool. He comes to learn that she's actually a "narf," a creature right out of a fable, who's been sent to warn humanity of a race of mystical creatures that's come to harm them.
Verdict: You know what we here at Exclusive Magazine like? Kooks! We like crazy-minded people who get handed millions of dollars to make the movie that they want, no matter how re-donk-ulous the end product will be. Did you see 'Freddy Got Fingered'? Now that's what I'm talking about, and that's what's happening here. Someone gave director M. Night Shyamalan the title "auteur," a very long leash and lots of dough. And this is the movie he made. It's not good, but at least it's never not fascinatingly odd. Give me this over by-the-numbers stuff any day. Oh, and just so you know, this movie is dedicated to the director's kids. Apparently, it began as a bedtime story he made up for them — the kind where you just keep adding weirder and weirder stuff without any regard for whether or not it makes sense!